HALF MAN HALF BISCUIT - For What Is Chatteris...

The incomporable Half Man Half Biscuit, track taken from their album 'Achtung Bono' released in 2005 on Probe Plus Records. One way system -- smooth and commendable Go by bus -- they're highly dependable The swings in the park for the kids have won awards The clean streets acknowledged in the Lords But what's a park if you can't see a linnet? A timetable if your journey's infinite? My bag's packed and I'm leaving in a minute For what is Chatteris without you in it? Car crime's low, the gun crime's lower The town hall band CD, it's a grower You never hear of folk getting knocked on the bonce Although there was a drive-by shouting once But there's a brass band everywhere And I don't drive, so I don't care And as a nightingale sang in Berkeley Square What's Chatteris if you're not there? Like a game-bird reserve short on pheasants Weavers' cottages devoid of tenants A market town that lacks quintessence That's Chatteris without your presence Three good butchers, two fine chandlers An indoor pool and a first class cake shop Ofsted plaudits, envy of the Fens Crick barriers at both ends But what's Chatteris if you're not there? What's Chatteris if you're not there? I may as well be in Ely or St.Ives